


We Will Always Be At War

by fictorium



Category: Spooks
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-07-09
Updated: 2010-07-09
Packaged: 2017-10-10 11:25:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/99228
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fictorium/pseuds/fictorium





	We Will Always Be At War

They talk of when the war started, not admitting that it never really stopped. The enemies change, the names and the capitals they have to infiltrate, but the Soviets give way to the insurgents and they gather the data with different stamps on fake passports.

There was a time when Ruth could still discuss it in the abstract, her life in towers of paper and facts; cold, hard facts that couldn't bleed in front of her, that couldn't beg for their lives.

She thinks she might have been happier then, when Harry's eye would catch hers across the perspex divisions and protocol that kept them apart. An accidental brushing of their hands was romance enough to beat Jane Austen into submission, and Ruth could sleep at night.

It's so hard to remember that now, in the grim reality of a new millennium and a new role. Every decision means weighing life against death, risk against reward. Even her most accurate calculations provide no guarantees, and she finally understands that quiet anguish in Harry's eyes; she begins to see it each morning in the mirror, too.

But there will be a Friday night, or perhaps a Sunday afternoon, and the sun will hit Harry's face in just the right way. Ruth, sitting next to him with the crossword on her lap (or yes, usually, an intelligence file) will look up and see the Harry she first met, who made her nervous in the very best way. It's like exhaling for the first time in days, and the weight of the ones they've lost, of the mistakes they've made, lifts from her chest and her shoulders until she thinks she might float.

Whatever he sees in the smile she gives him prompts a kiss, and Ruth thinks she might still be the same person she used to know. The blood on her hands will wash off, and their false identities will dissipate as fast as they appeared. Another war will come, a variation on this theme of _fight, lose, win, recover_, but for now they are at peace.


End file.
